By Dave Return
This week I have been blowing the lid on another one of those so-called “private-sector” franchises, in this case Virgin West Coast Trains, and their ludicrously over-priced and confusing fares structure. Having pored over their fares manual (with thanks to my usual contact for furnishing me with a 2008 edition), I have discovered a perfectly legal way of obtaining a much easier ticket from London Euston to Peterborough, taking you straight up the West Coast Main Line direct from the heart of the city to the heart of the Garden of England, nestling amongst the peaks of the Lancashire Fens.
Those foolish enough to go direct to the VCTW website, or one of those so-called discounted fare sites like the ridiculous “Train Line Dot Com” or those unprincipled Plagiarists at “Split Ticket Dot Com”, might just be able to secure an Advance Purchase single return ticket for the outrageous sum of £15. Fear not at this “faremongering”, for your “farebuster” extraordinaire has done his homework again so you don’t have to (or pay those idiots at national rail dot co dot uk any commission). This is how you beat the system:
- Walk from Euston to Paddington (not that far when the weather’s nice)
- Paddington to Henley-on-Thames (£16.70)
- Taxi to Marlow
- Marlow to Bourne End (only £3.00)
- Bus to High Wycombe
- High Wycombe to Aylesbury (another bargain at only £5.20)
- Aylesbury to Bletchley (no published fare due to “awaiting reinstatement of services,” apparently)
- Bletchley to Nuneaton (£18.90 if you go standard class)
- Nuneaton to Leicester (just £5.00 if you avoid the trap of taking a direct service on to Peterborough)
- Leicester to Nottingham (£11.30)
- Nottingham to Lincoln (£11.80)
- Lincoln to Gainsborough Lea Road (just £6.80)
- Walk to Gainsborough Central
- Gainsborough Central to Retford (a steal at £5.10)
- Retford to Stevenage (£10.70 Advance Purchase, don’t alight at Peterborough as that always confuses them!)
- Stevenage to Peterborough (£6.80)
So, yet again, you can beat the system for a fraction of the time it would take on foot, or the cost of a private helicopter. Stay tuned for the next thrilling instalment, where I take on the so-called “Island Line” and the challenge of finding the cheapest fare from Ryde to the other end of the line at Sheerness, and continue my campaign to Bring Back Pocket Timetables #BBPTcampaignbyDaveReturn